


monthly zodiac preview

by winterlilies



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, It's MidorimaxOG sososos, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Generation of Miracles, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Shyness, Slice of Life, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Slow To Update, Social Anxiety, This probably won't be your favorite fic but anyways, highschool, more TBA - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:48:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27717019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winterlilies/pseuds/winterlilies
Summary: ——　ᴡᴇ'ʀᴇ ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛʟʏ ʟᴏᴀᴅɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴇᴡ . . .　| ･:*:･『　filter: pisces + cancer love compatibility . *:･⁀➴ ♡ !　』❝　As two Water signs, Cancer and Pisces connect through emotions, usually as soon as they lay eyes on each other. This is one of the typical combinations of zodiac signs for love at first sight. Their main challenge is hidden in the changeable nature of the sign of Pisces, not because it is there, but because they might fear to show it. A fine balance needs to be made between excitement and stability, and they could be one of the most wonderful couples of the zodiac – Cancer inspired and Pisces with a feel of home　.　❞
Relationships: Kise Ryouta/Original Female Character(s), Kuroko Tetsuya/Momoi Satsuki, Midorima Shintarou/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 5





	1. Disclaimers, Tags & Warnings

〈 𝙳𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚖𝚎𝚛𝚜, 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚜 & 𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 〉 **♡**

≫ AU [ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE] in which team Shuutoku stay & rolls together despite the age difference, i luv those boys together. 

≫ Midorima/Shigemi slash, I know they're like basically underage but plz readers allow some smut. cut me some slack, you know aomine would do it too.

≫ plz forgive me if it goes OOC. also, plz forgive me but i refuse to use nanodayo in my writing - you can freely imagine it though. i just dislike it in my fics. 

≫ Shigemi POV. third person 100%. i'm sorry but i'm struggling with tenses so maybe sometimes it's past maybe sometimes it's present, at this point just murder me thx .

≫ bitchass!midorima & cutebaby!shigemi. lemme cuddle her, she's so soft, she just wants some luv.

≫ cursing? sometimes. fluff? totally. heartbreak? yeah, i know y'all want it as much as i do. so yes. 18+? 18+. reader discretion please. 

≫ this fic might contain mentions of severe anxiety, depression, social issues, mindfuck overall, overthinking and whatnot. we've all been there so cut shige some slack.

≫ i'm writing all these prompts and i'll upload three chapters and forget about the existence of this as well, i'm hella addicted to genshin impact rn. lol. sorry. 

≫ feel free to leave comments & kudos if you enjoyed! it helps me out a lot. anyways, i hope you'll proceed with caution if needed so, and i also hope you'll enjoy. lov u all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wonder if i will ever come up with any creative chapter names. anyways, hope you'll enjoy. xoxo

Change is something everyone experiences multiple times throughout their lives. Change of enviroment, change of friends, grades, hair or style choices, it's something everyone share in a way. Some people cherish it, eagerly looking forward to it, while others are afraid of it, despise it.

Change, for Shigemi, has always been wrapped around with uncertainties and a strange gush of excitement in the midst of sadness. A bittersweet connotation she didn't know what to do with other than accept it. 

It was just the beginning of September, her third month back in Japan. She's been studying abroad for the past two years in a student exchange program, and being back in this country she originally belonged to made her feel like she was an outsider. No matter where, though, she's always felt a little bit like that.

From looking for a new school to finding one that both satisfied her and her parents, Shigemi felt like she was going to die of overexertion. She knew what was coming, awkward introductions, everyone looking at her like fresh meat, getting into a new club and taking sports seriously again.... Yeah, sports.

One thing that never really changed was the first topic her parents started boasting about the minute they've met someone new. "Oh, our little Shigemi is an eight-time national champion and an absolute professional on the field of ballet. A lot of great things are waiting for her." If she would get 100 yen for anytime she's heard that, she'd now be swimming in money. For as long as possible she always preferred to hide her identity, it was utmost annoying when people started treating her differently just because actually talented people’ve seen something extraordinary in her.

Not like she was a natural, anyways. People always yearn for greatness and achievements, but they refuse to put the work required into it. It annoyed her. "Shige-chan, it's so cool that you've been to so many places! All over the world, it sounds like a dream." She heard atleast a hundred times a week by different people she kept around so loneliness wouldn't wash over her. What was it like to have real friends, anyways? Those who actually cared for her for herself and not with the fame that came with her. She had no clue. For a long time, she's felt like she was depressed, and day by day it was getting worse. Only working until she could pass out solved all the stress and bad thoughts that gathered in her mind day by day.

Going to a new school was certainly the most terrifying thing she could think of.

Her mind's been busy, eyes glancing from person to person as if someone would recognize her by her looks- and she was, in a way bizarre. White hair with a long streak of black strand has became her trademark, and she was referred to as the Fair Raven. It has became a thing to call her names, as if she was so awful and grim. When did ballet become a competition, anyways, over fun? She didn't know, she was just biting her lips, taking more and more hasty steps until-

Until someone bumped into her, knocking her out of focus, right onto the ground.

A shriek escaped her lips and she fell into the dirt, her black skirt now stained with a layer of muck. She couldn't even comprehend what was happening all of a sudden-

"See? Just what the hell are you doing right now?" A boy asked, holding back his laughter. He had light brown hair and similar colored eyes.

"Shin-chan, that was so rude of you." The other, raven-haired boy said now, shaking his head, giggling under his breath a little. Her eyes have been moving from one boy to the other, until one of them raised their voice.

"Don't act like you didn't push me, you idiot." It's not that he was screaming, but his voice, his tone just begged for attention, maybe unintentionally. It was hard not to pay attention to him. Maybe it was his voice.... Or those light green strands of hair.

"All of you are just terribly rude." Another one of them spoke up this time, he's had really short, spiky hair. He bent down, lending a hand to Shigemi who was still sitting on the ground, dumbstruck. "I'm sorry for their behavior." He mumbled, and Shige took his hand, standing up. She softly shook her head, humming along.

"It's okay." She added, dragging her fingers on the material of her skirt, cleaning, dusting it off a little bit.

"It's really not." He added now, and Shige gave him a reassuring smile.

"This is all your fault, Takao." The green haired boy mumbled, setting his elbow into the stomach of the shorter, dark haired boy. It was quite an amusing sight, watching them fight.

"This'll be ten laps around the gym in the afternoon for you two." Said the light haired boy who spoke for the first time as well, and this time, Shige raised an eyebrow.

"It's really not a problem. Don't punish them, I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time." She held her hands up defensively, guilt washing over her a little bit, making her stomach flinch.

"They'd deserve it even if they did absolutely nothing wrong. It's rude to push around and knock over cute girls." He answered, making a soft, rosy blush appear on Shige's cheeks.

The couple have still been loudly arguing, and it seems like if the brown haired boy wasn't the one with the most authority around, they'd have been cursing him as well.

"Thanks for helping me up. I really should get going." She mumbled, pushing a strand of white hair behind her ears. Her grey orbs were still a little unsure of what just happened. With that said, she quickly left the scene, leaving them to their fight.

Cute girl? Was he talking about her?

No, no. That was just a mistake.

────────────

The same afternoon, after everyone's been staring at her like she was some exotic bird, and a whole lot of awkward introductions, finally cleaning time has arrived. She was strolling around the school, messing around with the tiny badge of the school's logo on her vest. She wasn't entirely sure which club to join. She didn't want to be the Fair Raven of this school as well. Anytime her thoughts wandered to how people would see her, she hated how everyone believed she was only good at one thing, and nothing else. She was pretty interesting, after all! She's been a passionate fan of astrology, wildlife, a variety of sports, she loved mangas and hiking.... Which were probably really basic things for a girl. It felt like her mind was continously putting her off for her likes and things she's enjoyed, as if she had to be anyone else but herself for people to like her.

Maybe she did, though. The interal struggle was neverending, and she found herself at the gym once she awoke. The typical sound of indoor shoes creaking against the freshly coated wooden court were audible for a long time, but her mind was just simply ignoring it all along. Exploring a huge school like this has been difficult, and of course, her feet brought her this way without knowing so. 

"If you two don't finish the last three laps in two minutes, you'll be running for the rest of the practice!"

That was a voice she recognized. Inside the gym, she found a couple of familiar faces from the morning accident. They didn't seem to notice her at first, only when she finally set a foot inside.

"Don't you think that's a bit rough on them?"

"No, no. I like to watch those bastards suffer." Her eyes were glancing at the light brown haired boy, who only noticed her once he finished his sentence. "Oh, hi." He exclaimed quickly, making the other boy turn around too.

On the floor, there was a huge box of basketballs, waiting for the members to arrive.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you. I'm just... Exploring the school a little bit." Shige murmured, fidgeting with her fingers without noticing it.

"You're new? Oh. Now that you mention it, I don't recall seeing you ever before." This time it was the short haired boy who added a sentence to the conversation, making Shige sigh in relief.

She approached the two a little bit closer, bowing her head. "I'm Shigemi. You can call me Shige, if you like." She said, giving the two a gentle smile.

"The name's Kimura, and this is Miyaji."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Kimura-san, Miyaji-san." She bowed a little again, formalities were something she couldn't allow herself to let go of.

"So, what have you been exactly looking for, Shige-chan?" Miyaji asked, his arms crossed in front of him. He never took his eyes off her. It made her a little nervous.

"Honestly, I don't know myself. A club to join, maybe. I've still got plenty of time, though." She muttered, her fingers now messing with the little insignia again.

"What do you enjoy doing? Maybe we can tell you where you should be looking." Kimura said, glancing down on her now. That was just normal, though. All of these boys have been extremely tall, compared to her anyways.

"I-..."

"I'm telling you! She's actually insanely famous!"

That one sentence made Shige freeze in place. She turned around slowly, as the memorable duo from the morning walked into the gym, completely out of breath, wheezing. Were they...?

"Not only she's famous, but also extremely talented. A rising star!"

The raven haired boy was shouting rather loudly to the green haired one, who just seemed to ignore everything coming from his direction. A quick shiver ran down her spine as she gulped.

"Why should I care about that friend of your little sister, again?" The greenie asked, and Shige couldn't stop her frantically pounding heart. No. It wasn't about her, at all. She sighed in relief, and was about to answer the question they asked of her in prior when they finally reached her position, stopping right behind her. Looking back at them now again, it was quite the scary sight. So cold, and emotionless. And.. Was that a... Potted cactus? Why was it so big?

"Stop the meaningless chatter already and start your practice. How do you lazy bastards except to beat anyone if all you do is stand around?" Miyaji growled almost, making the rest of the boys moan in pain.

With that said, though, he moved into action as well, picking up a basketball and beginning the actual training.

Kimura-san was still standing in front of her. It feels like all the boys have been just staring at her, noone knowing why she was even around. She liked the bunch immediately, as far as you can like someone without knowing them one bit. Despite the harshness of the captain, it seemed like they were a close group of friends.... Maybe besides the one with the green hair. It seemed like everything and everyone's been annoying him.

"So?"

"Oh, sorry. I was completely distracted." Shige shook her head again, her eyes drawn back to Kimura again. He's been giving her a couple of instructions, as of where to find the teacher who's in charge of all the club leaders, and after thanking him for his advice, she left them to their practice. For some reason, she's been drawn to the place though, her heart aching a little with every step she took further away from it.

────────────

The next day, she was sitting in the teacher's lounge early in the morning.

"I'm sorry, Suominen-san. I'm afraid the ballet club doesn't operate anymore due to the lack of interest and space."

And there it was again, her heart sinking deep into the pit of her stomach. A part of her was glad that maybe she could find something else she's good at, but on the other hand, though, it was scary.

"We're aware of your accomplishments on the field, however, without a certain amount of students interested in the activity and a teacher who's fitting to teach choreography, it won’t be able to function. If you're interested in joining a sport club, nevertheless, the girl football and basketball team is always looking for new members. I can assure you that both of these clubs is a fitting and promising for someone as flexible and talented as you."

She acknowledged it all, but she wasn't any good at either of those sports at all. Athletism for her was in her flexibility, agility, not her strength. It was quite disappointing.

The news has set her mood for the rest of the week. They made her a bit more distant and quiet, and way more reserved than usual.

────────────

When friday has finally arrived, she was contemplating quitting this school and changing again. She's made no friends, barely any connections, and the barrier she put up wasn't absorbed by anyone but the basketball boys. That only because they were the ones that she's had an accident with.

It was unrealistic how unlucky she was and how it was the only thing that's brought a little action into her week.

She was cleaning the floor slowly, mopping in a continous rhythm, sighing every few seconds or so. Cleaning time was just something regular of every day, it made her body more and more tired so she was grateful. When she decided to join Shuutoku, she didn't know the ballet club has been disbanded. If she did, she wouldn't have joined probably. As much as she wanted to prove herself that she was good at other things as well, it didn't seem like it. Nothing felt right. Nothing.

She was strolling outside to empty the bucket of dirty water, when she reached the gym again, glancing inside for a second. It was a perfectly timed arrival, though, because the green haired boy who knocked her over did the most gorgeous shoot she's ever seen in her entire life.

He was standing on the central line of the court, and the basketball, after reaching a certain height just fell into the hoop with an incredible speed. She was blinking multiple times in a row, to make sure it was real, and the moment she's meant to spend at the doorway became a minute, which meant someone would notice her eventually.

She quickly got away, entering the cleaning room which was the third room in the small building part next to the gym, designated for the locker rooms. Her mind wasn't able to forget that shoot at all. She was pouring the water into the sink, when a door opened behind her, making her jump and twirl.

It was that boy. The tall, green haired one. The one with the strict, firm voice. Her gray orbs quaked a little.

"See, I’ve meant to ask you all week long..."

No introductions, no formalities. Her heart's been hammering in her chest, as she eyed the boy up and down.

"What business might Shigemi Suominen have in this school?"

He was holding a wooden block of whale in his hands that's been riding a vivid, blue wave.

"I.. I'm sorry, what?" Shige was confused, her voice cracked a little as she placed the bucket on the ground.

"You're the Fair Raven of Tokyo." He continued, making her feel demolished. Well, atleast it took a week for people to figure out who she was. That's more than she gets usually, anyways.

"Please don't call me that. It's nothing complementary." Shige mumbled, stepping away from the sink, approaching the door slowly. "And... Don't let others know who I am, please. I don't like the attention." She continued, gulping a little.

"You're all my little sister talks about." Before she had the chance to leave, though, he said that, and an amused grin appeared on her lips now. "She'd probably choke me in my sleep if I didn't bring an autograph from you." Was this a sick joke? She shook her head swiftly.

"I... How did you find out, anyways?"

"It wasn't hard. The trademark, the interviews she's always watching. She never stops rambling about you. People your age might not know you as much, but in a way, you're a role model for the generation coming after you." He said, his eyes unwavered.

"I'm... Literally sixteen. I'm not the role model of anyone. Please stop joking." Was she really going to beg, though? She couldn't allow herself that.

"You don't know how your career is pursued by others, so stop acting like you’re wielding the power of a God, putting thoughts into everyone’s minds based on how you feel about yourself." His words made her crumble a little. She was losing confidence day by day.

"I'm leaving." She wasn't going to stand there and take what he was on about. Escaping the building, Shige picked up the rest of her stuff and headed right to the front gate, only to be interrupted by Miyaji and Kimura once again.

"Shige-chan, hi. Did you find a club you'd like?" Asked Kimura with an upbeat smile, and she just shook her head, trying to make her way past them. Her behavior made people worried, surely. Before she'd leave their line of sight though, Miyaji moved after her, gripping her wrist quickly.

"If there's no other club you'd like to join, maybe you could be... The manager of the male basketball team. That, if you didn't find any other clubs you liked. You don't have to answer now, just... Think about it. Have a nice weekend." With that said, Shige didn't reply just pulled her arm away with a short nod, and ran away before anyone else found out who she was.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> watch this become my most updated fiction that noone reads
> 
> i don't care i love them so much ;-; 
> 
> enjoy uwu !!

A month went by since she's joined the new school. September was a whole lot of mess for Shigemi, starting with an early on accident to jokes about her fame, that conversation she's had with Midorima made her insane for the weeks to follow. She was sensitive, thinking continously about his request for his sister, yet somehow, it's never became a conversation topic between them again. He knew it was just better to leave it alone, and Shige felt guilty every single day seeing him, knowing she might have broke a little girl's heart somewhere in Tokyo. Heartbreak was normal, though. And so were these thoughts corrupting her mind without a stop.

She's made some friends, though. Superficial friends, but atleast people surrounded her keeping her loneliness at bay. Throughout the day, she was hanging out with three girls from her class, Minami, Ayame and Izumi. In their own way, they all were pretty ordinary. They've shared some of the same passions, but they were just way too extroverted for her kind. It wasn't bad though, but often she felt like a fourth wheel, following them around. Anything was better than nothing.

Later she found out that Midorima and Takao's class was next to her. Sometimes she'd see them during the lunchbreak, strolling away, their behavior typcial and characteristic as always. With a little insight given by Takao, she's also learned Midorima's obsession with astrology, zodiacs, lucky charms and this and that about his lifestyle. As well as the grandiose past he's held.

She has, in fact, heard about the Generation of Miracles before. A team of extremely talented, young players. In a way, even if it was unfair, she related to the treatment of famous players and why Midorima preferred to keep his distance from people. It was annoying, and superficial, and unnecessary, and she's never had the energy to deal with the praise of people who wouldn't move a finger yet still sought after fame themselves.

Miyaji-san's request has been on her mind quite a lot, as well. To become the manager of the male basketball club? Sounded like a big deal. A month's passed and she still wasn't sure. Telling her parents that the ballet club got disbanded made them absolutely furious and disappointed. They immediately wanted her to change schools or sign up to a private dance association. The first, she refused to do. She didn't want to deal with all the eyes staring at her again. The second, she was more okay with, but then it'd be a struggle to keep up with school, the club, the private lessons... It was just a mess, and it left her Shige slightly sleep deprived.

It was a gorgeous wednesday, with a chilly weather, the sun shining high on the horizon, caressing her cheeks. She's been wearing knee-height stockings and a skirt, with a long brown scarf wrapped around her neck. Early in the morning, her feet has brought her all the way to the gym once again, where this time, she's only found the head coach.

"Good morning, Nakatani-sensei."

Her voice echoed in the empty gym now, drawing the raven haired coach's attention. He placed the files he's been examing down onto the bench, turning her direction.

"Suominen-san." He bowed his head a little, his eyebrow arching.

"Miyaji-san has told me a month ago that the basketball team's looking for a new manager. I'd like to ask if the position is still free."

She didn't want to stay here longer than needed, feeling awkward as hell. The man hummed lightly.

"I've been asked a couple of times by other students as well who wanted to take this position. Tell me, Suominen-san, why would you be the fitting candidate?"

She gulped. Others wanted this role as well? She, of course, wasn't a fitting candidate. But... She wanted to belong somewhere.

"I'm uh... Good at making excercise plans. And um...."

That wasn't probably the most convincing thing ever, but nothing better came up in her mind.

"Hm?"

"I have a lot of free time in the afternoon...."

"Suominen-san.."

"And um, I like these boys a lot... They...!"

Suddenly, every word seemed to be heavier and heavier.

"They make me feel like I belong somewhere."

Her vision felt a little blurry. She really wasn't the best person for the role out there.

"Do you have any experience with file management? Are you able to look out for every single player on this team? This role involves phone calls, applications, filling out papers... You're aware of that, right?"

Well, she was done for. Her anxiety barely allowed her to make contact, and paying attention to so many things at once was difficult.

"A sense of belonging is important. These boys need someone who keeps them together. Calms down their battles, helps them make peace. It's a huge responsibility."

Her eyes were fixated on the peak of her shoes. She dared not to look up.

"A promise is, I'm afraid, not something that's durable in the long run if you can not trust your own senses, your own instincts. However, your track record is something that's very trustworthy. You know serious competition, and how to prepare for the battles ahead. None of these boys take basketball lightly. They are doing their best each and every day to become better and better, to live up to Shutoku's name and reputation. Do you think you're able to do the same?"

Did she think that?

Maybe.

"I'll give you a chance, but if you do not live up to my expectations, I'm afraid our paths will part."

Her heart was quivering in her chest, when he said that. She looked up with teary eyes, nodding along.

"I... - I.. Thank you, sense. I promise I won't disappoint you."

It was her chance to prove, and she wasn't going to fail.

────────────

Later on that day, she was eating lunch with her friends when Takao appeared at their table down at the cafeteria. Seemingly, he wasn't afraid of strangers.

"Shigemi-chan!"

He yelled with that typical grin and giggle combination of his, at first looking at her, then the rest of the girls.

"Ladies... Would you mind if I borrowed Shige-chan for lunch?"

Wait, what? A blush appeared on her cheeks as she choked on her onigiri a little. She coughed, and everyone's been staring at her.

"Did you get into trouble or something?" Ayame asked, smiling. She's had chocolate colored locks, long and shiny. Shige shook her head.

"You can take her, but make sure to bring her back by the end of the lunch break." Minami added, groping Shige's hand for a quick second. She finally stopped coughing, and instead of asking anything, she just wrapped the rest of her bento into a paper napkin, and stood up.

"What's going on? Where are we going?" Shige murmured, following Takao closely. The boy's had his hands behind his nape, grinning as usual. "And where's Midorima? You two are always together." She continued, upon realizing the absence of the more serious counterpart of this comedic duo.

"Don't you worry about any of that, Shige-chan!" He always seemed so upbeat and troubleless. Shige was almost envious of that.

He's led her down the corridor to the last classroom on the left, and entered it without knocking. It all seemed a little suspicious, and she was worried despite him telling her not to. She was just about to ask about this abrupt entrance, when the...

Entirety of the basketball club started loudly screaming at her when she's set foot inside the room.

"Congratulations, Shige-chan!" These words hit her from multiple directions, from multiple people, and she was just standing there dumbstruck, blushing. A huge paper cutout was hanging on the ceiling shaping the same word they've been repeating as well.

"Wh.. What's this for?" When she finally managed to ask, Takao's cuddled her up against his side, his arms around her shoulders. She was just blinking, staring at all the boys who approached her, holding a tiny, white confetti cake.

"Of course, it's because you've just officially became the manager of the basketball club!"

Officially? What?

"Nakatani-sense said..."

"The coach says a lot of things. He straight up declined everyone else's applications. We've been telling him you'd come around eventually, and that's what he's been waiting for. He sees your potential, as well!" Kimura said, some confetti and glitter stuck to his skin.

Potential? What potential? Her heart was welling with joy. She bit her lower-lip, holding her tears back once again.

"I.. - I..."

She's been stuttering, again. The reaction of the boys to her struggle was full of smiles and grins, encouraging her seemingly. "I can't wait to work with all of you."

Lighthearted chatter filled the room, and the huge boulder on her heart seemed to crumble and fall as well. She's been sitting at one of the desks with the rest of the team, finishing her bento and then sharing some cake together. When finally the focus was off of her, her eyes sought out Midorima's once again.

His gaze, as per usual, wasn't something she could read anything out of. Today he was accompanied by a snowball. Probably the hugest one she's ever seen. It was really pretty, showcasing a mountain-y area, like some resort.

"M-Midorima-kun..." She turned his way, gaining his attention. They were sitting relatively close to eachother, so she's had a good look at his sharp yet somehow delicate features, long eyelashes, cold eyes that showcased lightness in the most unexpected ways.

"I would like to make up for my wrong behavior. Could you maybe bring me something your sister likes?" Shige said, her fingers tapping on the chopsticks. He didn't reply. 

"You're unusually quiet..." Shige added now, and Takao stepped into the conversation.

"According to the Oha Asa, today is most unfortunate for cancers like him. These days he avoids contact the best he can, leaves as early as possible... Makes up for all the whims he is allowed in one day. Isn't that right, Shin-chan?" He asked, pushing his elbow into the other one's arm. Midorima, however, with one swift movement pushed Takao out of the scene once again.

"Shigemi." Hearing her name on his lips like that made Shige glance at him like a doe. As if she was his pray, waiting to be devoured.

"I disapprove of you becoming the manager of this club. You're not living up to your talents, it makes your potential waste away. This kind of behavior is absolutely unacceptable."

When she finally felt in place, of course, that happened. She looked down on her hands. Of course she knew these. She knew, but she couldn't do what she wanted to. She wasn't even sure what she wanted anymore... Her stomach flinched.

"I don't like you, or people like you. Forget what I've asked for, she's already over it."

Why couldn't life treat her just normally for one day? She slowly nodded.

"I see.. I'll make sure that you won't see me a lot."

Why did she even prefer to stay in this school? Was this emotional torment worth it? The lively chatter was neverending around them, noone even seemed to notice the small conversation between them. He pushed his glasses up, and once it seemed to be done for, she stood up.

"Thank you all for your kind treatment." Shige said, bowing a little. Making her escape was necessary once again, and instead of her classroom, her feet led her to the nearest bathroom, where she finally allowed those burning tears to stream down on her cheeks.

Why was it so hard to find a place that felt like home?


	4. Chapter 4

Although she’s achieved one of her only goals which she set for herself when she joined Shutoku, something still felt wrong. She was succesful at finding a club she liked, however, to feel comfortable around them way way harder to achieve. The one person she related to the most treated her like dirt, and she didn’t know what to do with that feeling. Could she talk about it to someone? Would anyone even understand? Not the girls. Not the boys. Noone. So it was just welling up in her soul overtime. 

On Friday she was discussing how matches happened in a nutshell with the coach, he explained the contact list she needs to reach out to, and they’ve also been talking about different diets and practice plans for each boy. She honestly wanted to take care of them and help them reach new heights. That meant sitting down with all of them, going through a small conversation of what they should focus on based on their past practice and experiences. However, when she was sitting in front of Midorima, he was as unreachable as ever. 

“I don’t need a special diet, nor your excercise plans. I know what I have to do in order to never miss my shots.” 

Despite his words, she still made him a minor outline as well on the weekend. It mostly included heavy lifting and squatting in order to make his legs and arms stronger. He didn’t seem to struggle, but it never hurts to enhance his muscles anyways. For the rest of the team, she’s made similar plans to help out their stamina and speed. The practices she came up with mainly included quick passing games to enhance their interplay and teamwork. Despite Midorima’s preference or achieving victories alone, they all knew they couldn’t only depend on him and his shots. 

The next week, Shigemi arrived to school extremely exhausted. Perfecting an outline for everyone has made her lose sleep, but it was an initial, one time thing. She knew she’d sleep good eventually, but for now, the weight of her work has been lifted from her heart, and she was somewhat upbeat when she was approaching the gym in the morning. The head coach examined her data thoroughly, approving most of them. He, however, did question the part talking about Midorima’s diet. 

“I agree with the part mentioning fresh fruits and vegetables, but nuts, legumes and fish might be more difficult. He’s a picky eater.” 

Shigemi rolled her eyes. Of course he was a picky eater, he was a picky everything. She picked up her bag, placing it into her lap, and retrieved a lunch box and opened it. Inside, there was still warm rice-rolls, mashed potatoes, peas, carrots, grilled salmon and a handful of uncooked nuts. On the other part of the parted lunchbox, there were strawberries cut into neat pieces, cranberries and a protein bar. 

“I’ve prepared some for everyone.”

Nakatani-sensei’s eyes glimmered lightly, then a kind, seemingly satisfied smile sat up onto his lips.

“Thank you for your hard work.” 

Shigemi felt relieved.

────────────

She wasn’t required to be present at the afternoon practices, yet she always appeared. Sometimes she was sitting up high in the visitor seats, other times she was refilling water bottles, leaving protein bars on the bench, running errands for the coach... In a way, that gave her some peace of mind. Did this busy job of hers technically force her to quit ballet? Maybe. Apparently, noone else other than Midorima knew about who she was, and it’s what she preferred. She was thankful that noone paid close attention to other parts of the field of sports enough to come across her name. One afternoon, though, after practice, she’s stayed around to help the boys clean up, and naturally, they’ve engaged in a conversation.

“So, where’ve you been going to junior high-school, Shige-chan?” Takao asked while mopping the floor. 

She didn’t turn into his direction while she was gathering all the basketballs laying around.

“I- You probably don’t know.”

“Come on, try me.”

“I wasn’t studying in Japan. I’ve spent two years abroad in Europe before I came home a few months ago.” 

That made everyone stop in movement. Once the creaking ceased, she straightened her back as well, only to meet a bunch of staring eyes.

“Europe? Where?” Asked Kimura, wiping his forehead with a clean cloth. 

“The Netherlands. It’s a beautiful country. Lots of colorful sights and very nice people.” Shige gave them a gentle smile. This story seemed to rile all of them up, so they’ve started bombarding her with questions. Eventually, the conversation has reached the topic of personal interests. 

“My hobbies?” She asked, scratching her nape a little. “I’ve been dancing for a long time.” 

They all seemed to be asking to know more.

“Were you any good?” Asked Otsubo, who was now sitting on the central line, drinking water from his bottle. It might have seemed like a little bit of a mean, weird question, but she didn’t mind it.

“I don’t think that matters too much. I’ve enjoyed it with my whole heart, and that means more than any accomplishments.” Shige said, her hands fumbling with the hem of her skirt.

“That’s quite humble for an international champion.” Midorima’s voice was abrupt and chilling, interrupting the ligthhearted conversation. Silence crept in, then everyone started yelling.

“You’re a international champion?!” They screamed, and a violent, red blush appeared on her cheeks. She was doomed. 

“Eight times winner. In a row.” 

She didn’t have any space to talk, she just wanted to seem as small as possible. 

“How do you know about these things anyways, Shin-chan?” Asked Takao to lighten the mood a little bit, but it couldn’t be helped. This time, a weird blush appeared on his cheeks as well, and it completely distracted Shige. 

“You’re this good at dancing and you’ve decided to become a manager?!” They’ve asked of her, and she shook her head lightly.

“Working with you boys doesn’t mean I can’t pay attention to other things. Don’t worry about me.” Modesty seemed to be one of her best traits, but it was insanely backfiring on her now. She utterly disliked Midorima for his behavior towards her, for how godlike he treated himself. He looked so annoying with that stuffed beaver in his hands, despite hating violence, she just wanted to punch him. Weeks ago she's begged him not to tell anyone, and now, his hatred engulfed on her and was unleashed.

Without any further comments, Miyaji walked up to Midorima, and gave him a good old slap on the neck, making the other one groan in pain. It almost seemed like something that happens regularly.

"Don't you notice that she didn't want to talk about that? Bastard," And with that, a onesided wrestling battle began where the taller boy didn't even had a chance. Fighting back against your captain would mean your end, after all.

"Sooner or later you would have found out anyways." Shige shrugged, finishing her minor tasks of cleaning up.

Later on during the week, she's shared some minor experiences from all over the world, without feeling forced or stressed to do so. They seemed to enjoy spending time with her, thanking her every day for their meal and her care. Overall, it all paid off pretty much. Shige tried to ignore Midorima the best she could, but it was a rather challenging task as he made a core part of the team. Despite the mutual dislike she's put her heart into his food as well as everyone elses. Without her knowledge as well, her eyes were often seeking him out, examining his features, learning the words he liked to use, sometimes she even checked the daily Oha Asa report as well, trying to predict the size of the daily lucky charm he was going to bring with himself.

She really didn't like Midorima, but he was, pretty unique.

Apparently, Thursday was a bad day for cancers. That day, Midorima kept both of his hands bandaged, his lucky charm was so big he had to carry it with two hands, and he refused to talk to overall anyone.

"Nee, do you know what happens to him if he's.... Talking on a bad day?" Shige asked Takao during their lunchbreak, in which now Midorima kept their distance from them as well. They've been sitting on the rooftop on a bench, scarfs wrapped around their necks and tiny boxes of bento warning their hands.

"Shin-chan? He takes this whole astrology thing way too seriously. The coach allows him three whims a day, otherwise he'd get mad at him. Usually he doesn't care, though, as long as he performs his best and wins." Takao said, happily munching on today's meal, which included shrimps. He seemed to like those, and Shige tried to make a mental note of it.

"I don't understand this whole dislike of his towards you, though. But then again, he doesn't really like anyone on the surface. After all, he's a tsundere."

Shige's eyes slid to the side, from Takao to Midorima, who's face was buried in a scarf as well. He wasn't eating the food she prepared for him, over that, he's been eating ricerolls with eggs.

"Deep down though, I think he has real feelings. Serious ones. He just doesn't like expressing them. Makes him vulnurable and all that." He said, and then stuffed another shrimp into his mouth.

"I'm glad you're enjoying your food, Takao-kun."

"You're joking, right? This is godlike!"

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On the third week of October, the temperature significantly dropped and it was snowing in the morning. The night has been unusually cold, and Shige's been wearing black cotton stockings that was entirely covering her legs. Getting to school was more of a struggle than ever before, more so because of the public transport delay due to the sudden snowstorm. She was late to school already, but she couldn't speed up her tempo at all, as there was a high chance of slipping and falling.

Two streets away from the school, she's barely seen anyone on the streets. The loudspeakers of the district instructed everyone to stay inside until the snowstorm calms down, and suddenly, panic rushed through her veins. Where could she go, now? She didn't know anyone who lived close, wasn't sure about the location of nearby stores, any safe shelter was out of her reach. She looked around confused, snowbite scratching her chin and cheeks, eyes burning thanks to the cold. Her legs have been feeling weaker, as well. She's been up since early morning, making the final preparations necessary for the team's lunch, and now, it felt like she couldn't take another step due to her missing breakfast.

One, two, three more steps.... Her knees buckled a little. Shige's vision has grown more and more hazy, and suddenly, a couple of fingers wrapped around her wrist.

"Shigemi."

She could barely see. There was no other words said, the stranger just started pulling her into a direction, hooking up her arm over their shoulders. Whoever this was, she'd be forever grateful.

Once her limbs have grown warmer again and she could feel her fingers, she's examined their surrounding. It seemed like small grocery store, the usual scent of tomatos crept into her nose.

She looked around, only to find noone around her. No vendor, no savior. Her legsfelt a little weak still, but she stood up, holding into a woven basket for help.

Peeking outside on the window, the snowstorm seemed neverending. She sighed, thinking, if it wasn't for this person, she could have collapsed outside as well. Eventually, upon hearing movement probably, a vendor came around from the storage and manager room probably.

"Are you alright, dear?" She asked with the warmest smile ever, holding out her hands. Shigemi's given her frozen fingers to her, and after a little hiss, she started rubbing them. "One hell of a storm, in the middle of October. Climate is crazy, isn't it?"

Shigemi nodded slowly, looking around herself curiously. "Did you come outside for me?" She asked on a low, raspy voice. The vendor, Saya, according to her nametag, shook her head. "No, no. After I've noticed your stumbling outside, this young man volunteered to bring you inside without hesitation."

Warmth washed over her cheeks. She wanted to show gratitude to this young man without having to wait any longer. "Can I talk to him?" Shige asked, and Saya smiled at her.

"Of course. He's back there, trying to warm up as well. Go and join him in the room on the right. It's nice and warm in there, do something about these frozen fish fillets!" She laughed groping her fingers, and it was so wholesome. Shigemi thanked her quickly, and while holding her back, she ventured to the back of the building, past the "STAFF ONLY" door.

She knocked on the door lightly, but only after opening it did she realize that the rumor is true. Disaster is always followed with disaster.

"So you're back on your feet."

Midorima exclaimed, and Shigemi just stood there.

"Wa-was it... You?" 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UM, HELLO??? i have pre-written about three more chapters i was just so busy with school and gaming that i couldn't upload. i am telling that to my twenty (20) hit-readers on my fic. you are all appreciated like crazy lol!!!! it's always like this. when i love a fic noone else does, and when i hate it, everyone loves it. lmao. anyways. here's this chapter. and some more later :-) make sure to throw your kudos out !!! and save as a bookmark for later so you can follow my messy uploads. stay safe peeps. lov u.

"Of course it was me, silly."

Midorima's nose was still a bit red from the cold. He's been sitting on the wooden floor near the heater. It wasn't much, it surely didn't warm up the whole room, but if she could cuddle up against it, that'd be heavenly.

"How was I supposed to know, anyways..." Shige murmured, letting her bag slip out of her fingers. Today, for some reason, Midorima didn't seem as distant as usual. She sat down onto a chair, laying her head onto her arm, looking at his unusual, light green locks. He's had beautiful hair, delicate locks, and all she was thinking about was combing it with her fingers.

She still felt really dizzy. Cold swings shivered her body, but she didn't say anything about it.

"You're lucky I was still on my way to school as well when the warning was displaced. I doubt that vendor lady would have been able to carry you inside."

Her eyes widened.

"Are you trying to say I'm fat?" Shige asked back without thinking, and once she finished her sentence she realized what she said, sealing her lips with her fingers.

"N-no. It's just a heavy storm, and unfortunate things happen. This is a very bad day for your sign." He said, and that made her eyebrows wrinkle.

"You don't even know what's my sign."

"It's Pisces."

Shige was once again speechless. She felt tired, and wasn't in the mood to oppose or question him anymore.

"Are you saying if it wasn't for my Cancer savior, I could still be freezing outside?" She murmured, her fingers playing with the hem of her skirt.

"I am. You should be more grateful than saying silly jokes and calling me names."

"I am grateful. It's just.... Achoo!" She couldn't finish her sentence due to a loud sneeze that almost ripped her lungs into half. Once her eyes met Midorima's again, he seemed concerned. Without another word, he stood up from the floor, stepping closer. He brushed her bangs to the side gently and held his hand against her forehead.

"Very unfortunate." He said, and then left the room. Shigemi, without his allowance threw herself onto the floor against the heater, hugging her thighs close to her chest.

Midorima came back a few minutes later with a deep blue blanket in hand, and a pill for her fever.

"Take this, and move." He said, no, instructed. She swallowed the pill immediately while he made a burrito out of her body, wrapping her into the blanket that smelled like lilies. Shige slid forward on the floor, and Midorima sat right behind her.

"I swear to God if you tell anyone..." He mumbled, and she knew he was certainly blushing.

"I'll be silent." Shige whispered, setting her back against his chest. His arms seemed to cradle her in the most respectful way ever, not even touching her body just radiating warmth from everywhere. He smelled like mint and watermelons, a sweet and spicy connitation that her nose liked so much. Slowly, her shivers seemed to die out as well.

"Why are you so distant with everyone?" Her eyes were watching the little heater as she asked him a question.

"It's just the way I am." When he answered, his body quaked a little, and Shige could feel every word against her back.

"I wonder why are you doing this right now. I wonder why am I allowing it." She continued, her fingers intertwined.

"You're cold and you have a fever. As there are no other ways to keep you at optimal warmth...."

"Why do you even care so much?" Blurting that out made both of them quiet for a long time.

"I don't." He said that, but she surely knew that wasn't actually the case. It didn't matter, though. Thanks to the warmth of the heater next to her and his warmth everywhere around her, Shige's fallen asleep.

She woke up to her whole body freezing once again, and someone gently stroking her shoulder.

"Hey, sleepyhead. How're you holding up?" Saya asked, but even blinking felt painful. Shige just groaned and shook her head a little, which left her dizzy again. "I'd assume this much. You've literally slept through the whole day, but your fever didn't really go down. Maybe you should take another pill?" She asked softly, and Midorima entered her vision as well. He's had his vest unbuttoned, showing the white shirt under it. She didn't know when he left, but waking up in his absence made her somewhat disturbed.

"That'd be nice, thank you." She nodded and left them to it to search for another pill. In the meantime, Midorima sat down.

"What's the time?" Shige murmured, staring at him blankly.

"It's about 5 PM."

Last time, it was nine in the morning. Maybe ten. She didn't go to school, and she didn't check her phone all day, and she was sleeping in the arms of this mean, cold, bastard who's had a charming scent and a warm body... It was getting too much.

"The store is about to close soon. It still didn't clear up entirely yet, but we can't stay here." He continued, then sighed a little. "How far do you live?"

"About an hour and half with train...." Shige said, and Midorima nodded.

"That's not an option now. I'll take you to my place and we'll call your parents there so they can pick you up."

God, was that the fever getting to her, or his words that made her blush? There was no room for denial. Before she could answer though, Saya came back with another pill and some water, and they've sat down to chat a little bit.

Thirty minutes later Shige's had her and Midorima's backpack on her back while she was Midorima's backpack. He was holding her legs at his side, her nose brushing against his nape gently as he carried her now. His words were, "I don't want you to stumble and fall then start crying." It made her really irritated, but that wasn't anything new.

Being this close to him, when he was quiet made up for all of his whims and stupidity.

────────────

She's been wrapped around him as if she was a little monkey her mother had to carry. Her senses failed her mostly, mainly her sight, but from this distance, her head buried into his nape didn't really carry the promise of a great view. Once he stopped after twenty minutes of suffering in the snow, he put her down, messed with his keys for a second and then let her go ahead. She was gripping onto the railing as if her life depended on it, but eventually, she entered the small, beige colored apartment.

"Wait here. I'll let my mother know that you're here, but won't stay for long." Oh, how she wished she could insist though! This Midorima was nice. He seemed concerned and humanly, and approachable and maybe even a bit more vulnurable.

She stepped out of her shoes that were still somewhat wet from the morning, and looked around in the cozy looking antechamber. Wrapping herself out of her coat she hung it up, and then retrieved her phone from her bag.

Thirty one missed calls, eight messages.... She gulped.

"Where r u!? R u ok? Call me ASAP." Her inbox was full of messages like this from her parents, who seemingly got extremely worried thanks to her lack of responses.

Before she could ring her mother back though, two pairs of rushing feet against the wooden floor approached her. The first was a little girl in a sweet, frilly dress, and the other was Midorima, trying to hold her back.

"No way!!!!!" She yelped, holding her hands in front of her mouth. Shigemi gave her a tiny smile and waved her hand.

"Hiemi, get back here, now. " He said, hooking one arm around the girl who tried her best to escape his grasp.

"I have so many questions, let me go! You don't know what this means to me! If you don't let me go in this instant I am going to hate you forever and ever!!!" She cried, but the noise seemed to die down a little. Muffled sounds arrived from one part of the apartment, and Shige felt so silly just standing there, watching. In a minute, a lady appeared, probably Midorima's mom, in a kuma apron.

"Hi sweetie. I've heard what's happened today. How are you feeling right now?" She asked, approaching her immediately to check her temperature again. Shige shook her head. "Not so great, eh? I'll make you a light meal, you shouldn't have gone hungry for so long." She said, giving her a smile. As well as that, she took hold of her hand too, taking her right to the kitchen. Something that smelled really nice was cooking on the electronic stove, and it made Shige's stomach rumble.

"Thank you so much for- well... For looking out for me." Shige said, a shy expression sitting on her face now. Midorima's mom shook her head.

"Don't even mention it, dear. Thanks to Hiemi we all know a lot about you and your career. Although I wish our first meeting would have been nicer, this is a pleasure as well." Something felt so weird about what she was saying. Did they all really know her so well just by the interviews that were uploaded online? "Take a seat and let me give you some juice."

Eventually, Midorima's came around too. It took a long time, but he did, and he looked like a mess. He wasn't wearing his school vest anymore, and he's hair was all over the place as if he's been fighting.

"Did you call her parents yet, mom?" Was his first question when he entered the kitchen. She looked confused at him.

"No, I thought you would." She started setting the table in a knowing rhythm.

"That'd be really strange. You should call them."

"Are you afraid of a phone call, Shin?" She asked, looking at him amused.

"Am not! Just imagine how would her parents react though if a guy called them on their daughter's phone!"

Shigemi was, for some reason, really amused, even though she should have been guilty for postponing that phonecall for so long.

"Um, I-... I can call them too. They're my parents, after all." Both of them looked at her, but Midorima kept it quiet.

"That's alright dear, whatever you wish. Save your energy though. Today's been a hard day." His mom gave her cheeks a light stroke before putting some mashed potatoes and boiled veggies onto her plate. Sometimes in the distance she'd hear the door being kicked and punched-

"I'll let her out once Shigemi's got some food in her system." He was smart, answering the question before it even arrived. Midorima's mom just nodded, continuing her meal quietly.

It's all been a strange caricature. Midorima acting normal, her mother being the nicest woman on the planet, this high budget, cozy, modern home, an adoring sister- Was she really awake?

Later one, she was sitting on the couch, her legs against her chest once again. Her phonecall with her mother went smooth, if she didn't count the part where she screamed her head off in worry. Once she's given an address, she was already on her way to pick her up.

"Are you alright?" A familiar voice sounded behind him, and Shige gave him a kind nod. "Can you handle this little demon if I let her out now?" He asked, his arms crossed.

"I've seen worse things than enthusiastic little girls." Shige murmured, a smile blooming on her lips.

When Hiemi appeared again, she's been carrying a whole stash of printed pictues and posters of her from interviews, competitions, advertisements she's publicly done. It felt like a punch in the gut, but she was really trying to act normal.

"I-... I... -I...." The little girl stood in front of her, stuttering, some or her papers falling onto the ground.

"C'mon." Shige said, gesturing her closer. Another step though, and some of the pictures started falling. When they reached the ground, Shige's bent down, picking up the one closest to her. Midorima was sitting nearby.

The one she's laid hands on was from her last bigger competition. She's been wearing a lively blue-pink dress attached to her skin like an extra layer, rhinestones all over it. She's had strange feelings about looking at it, it made her flushed and awkward and shy that someone genuinely liked her so much.

Hiemi sat down next to her, and as much of an energy bomb she was earlier, she seemed really modest and calm down. For long, she didn't say anything just stared at her features with glimmering eyes. "I.. I think you're beautiful." The girl was about nine years old with so much childlike innocence written on all of her features. Shige felt so soft.

She slid her left hand onto Hiemi's cheeks and stroked it with her thumb. “And I think you're even more beautiful. Which one should I autograph for you, now?”

Once that was done, Hiemi inched closer to her every few seconds or so, and eventually Shige wrapped an arm around her, so they've been cuddling together on the warm couch.

"You smell nice as well." She said now, curling the very end of her hair around her middle finger.

"Thank you. You're a sweet little thing."

She was surprised Midorima stayed quiet for so long, so when her eyes ventured to him, he was just sitting there in absolute shock. His eyes were widened but there was sor thing soft in his features.

"Do you think I can be like you someday?" Hiemi asked now, staring at the glass coffee table nearby.

"Why'd you wanna be like me?" Oh, Shige hoped noone would end her way ever. She was an anxious, depressed mess that barely had any goals or motivation.

"I.. - I..." Hiemi sighed a little. She knew this feeling far too well. "You're an amazing dancer, but not because of how well you learn your coreography. In every move or yours, there's delicacy, softness, your whole personality shining through. Your love for ballet is far greater than your ache for victory, and that's what I think is so beautiful about you." That, she absolutely didn't expect. She was so young yet spoke in so nicely constructed sentences. Shige's heart was quaking.

"Sure you'll overshine me one day if you try your best." She said, rubbing her shoulders softly.

"Really?" Hiemi's eyes were like stars. Shige nodded. "I'll try my best!" Her heart was just so full of the kindness and innocence of this one little girl.

She made a promise to her to show her this and that in the future. Midorima stayed quiet all the way.

When someone rang the doorbell, Shige knew it was time and she was longing to stay here and talk.

Thanks to her mom, Hiemi disappeared again after a cuddly goodbye, and now, in the antechamber, Midorima was helping her to get her coat on.

"You're barely like yourself."

"In contrast to your misfortune, I was predicted a good day, and I was carrying my lucky charm as well." He said, showing off the pen in his hands with the bobbing head of a cat.

"Still. Even on your better days you're oh so gloomy and cold." She said, squeezing her feet into her shoes.

"Don't expect this to happen all the time, idiot." He said, but his expression remained soft. "You've had a bad day and I was just around to help."

Shigemi rolled her eyes. How could she expect him to stay this way, anyways. "Well... If you'll bring me back my plastic boxes when we meet next time," She said, looking for something in her bag, "Then you can have these." Once the search was done, she held a dozen of bento boxes neatly placed onto eachother. It was everyone's lunch for the day. "Make sure to keep it in the fridge, the shrimp probably doesn't like warmth." She said, and of course, she wasn't expecting gratitude or anything. He just nodded, taking the bento from her.

"See you later." That was promising. "Oh and by the way, I still dislike you for your choices."

Shigemi looked back at him before opening the door.

"Back at ya." A light smile was sitting on her lips, which was now, for some reason, returned.

That night, once she was staring at the ceiling sleep deprived in her own bed, she was thinking about that soft smile of his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UMM, SOFT MIDORIMA ANYONE ?????? don't worry yall heartbreak is on the way.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not my best, not my worst. i feel a little weird about my writing style, but i don't know how or what to change. idk what even feels weird. anyways, lol, i've pre written five billion chapters so i'll upload them without a schedule and hope someday i'll reach (30) hits. lol. love u.

For the rest of the week, Shige's stayed home, and a Tokyo-wide restriction was announced due to heavy storming all week long. In a couple of days she's felt alright again, as if that fever was nothing on her body. In reality, her system was more sensitive than a normal person's, meaning that staying out in the cold for long can make her sick easily. Her mom decided to stay home as well to take care of her, and now they've been just spending their days laying together, watching something on Netflix, or creating tiny Halloween crafts. There was a lot of time on their hands, and Shige's felt comfortable around her. More often than not though, her thoughts were elsewhere, which resulted in being distracted.

"Are you feeling okay, Shi?" Her mother asked with that ever so kind smile of hers. Shige nodded.

"Mhm. I've just been thinking about how much school work I'll have to catch and fill up on due to this emergency break.... I'm already tired." A giggle's escaped her lips, and her mother hummed along.

"Me and your father, we've been talking about ballet and... While it's great that you've found something to occupy yourself with, you shouldn't ignore dancing either. The year will end soon, and our plans for the year haven't been reached. There's still so much to do. I hope you remember that."

As if she wasn't tired enough. Shige dared not to go against her words, so she just gave some relief to her.

"I remember, of course. Don't worry, I'll get to the end of my plans, Ma."

She didn't want to think about what'd happen if she didn't. Her relationship with her parents would be destroyed.

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Going to school next week was as strugglesome as ever. The roads were still snowy, but the weather forecast was free of heavy storms, predicting warm, sunny days ahead. She wouldn't expect this in October, especially that it's going to be Halloween soon, and snow isn't exactly the best theme of the tradition.

Passing the familiar gates of the school makes her stomach flinch. She hasn't seen Midorima for a few days now, and her thoughts have made a mess in her head. Not like there was anything going on, he was just helping her out on an unlucky day. She's checked Oha Asa early in the morning to hear out what the day was going to bring, and according to it, it'll be a lucky day for Cancers. It made her relieved, even his stingy comments were better than that complete silence he sat in from time to time.

It's been a hot topic for students to talk about the sudden break, what they've been doing with that extra free time on their hands. Her friends were no different, chitchatting around during the lunchbreak. Shige's eyes were basically pinned to the boy whenever he appeared during the short lunch. The bento's she's left for all of them at the start of the day was in his hands, as well as Takao's. She was spacing out, and her friends noticed it as well.

"Hello? Earth to Shigemi? Are you with us?" Asked Ayame and with a subtle little blush she turned back towards them.

"Hm, what? Sorry, did you ask something?"

"Um, yeah. We were wondering if you're going to come to the school's Halloween party."

Oh, right. That was a thing too, apparently.

"If you want to go, I can surely come too." She said, and all of her friends got really enthusiastic.

"Amazing! We'll come up with a costume plan, then."

Once her eyes trailed back to where he's been sitting before, he was already gone. A sigh left her lips, as she went back to finishing her lunch.

In the afternoon, she stayed for the practice. For some reason, it was really difficult to act normal during the two hour club activity. She kept dropping the water bottles, messed up the order of the papers, stared in front of herself more than usual. Sitting next to the coach she was staring at Midorima's perfect shots in awe, ignoring the world around her. Eventually, hands touched her shoulders. 

"Are you feeling alright, Suominen-san?"

As an addition to her struggle to pay attention, she got a bit jumpy as well. The question shook her back into reality, and she nodded fast.

"O-of course. It's just been a long day."

"Could you go and get me a coffee from the teacher's lounge?"

She stopped her scribbling and hummed, putting the papers down onto the bench and leaving immediately. It was still really cold, but somehow the snowy landscape seemed more cozy than she thought before. Tiny mounds were collected on the side of the pavement as she walked from the gym to the main building, and when she looked behind her, she was leaving footsteps in the fresh snow. Smalls things like that held place in her heart.

────────────

Days went by without interaction with Midorima, and it's been heavy on her mind without a stop. Why? In the end, there were still so many things she didn't underatand about him, or didn't even particularly like. His whims about luck and the planets and weird ideals made him so mysterious, and she just wanted to know a little more.

"Sailor Moon."

They've decided to think about group costume ideas for the school's Halloween party a few days ago, and Izumi bursted into the classroom, cheeks still red from the frostbite. She slapped her hands on the table where the rest of them were sitting, and now, they were all just staring at her in confusion.

"Sailor Moon what?" Asked Minami. 

"We have to dress up as the Sailor Moon girls!" Izumi groaned and then grinned.

As they've had no better idea than barnyard animals, the Mean Girls, and the Scooby Gang, they've just went with Sailor Moon.

The same afternoon, when she was still waiting for everyone to arrive, Midorima was the first to come. He always arrived early, but now he's been ten minutes before even the others would start falling in.

"Hey."

Looking up at him, he was wearing a black cotton jacket when he stopped in front of her. Nothing was unusual about him, yet Shige still felt a little awkward.

"Hm?"

"I've brought you back your boxes."

Oh, she completely forgot about those. Being flustered crawled up onto her cheeks. "Thanks for reminding me." Her voice was lower than usual as she took the boxes he placed into a plastic bag. The nametags on them were a little faded, probably due to the boxes being washed.

"Did you like it?" She asked all of a sudden, not even knowing where it all came from.

"It was ordinary." Maybe a comment that doesn't bring her food down was something almost as good as a compliment.

"Is there something you'd like to eat more of? Why are the labels faded? Did you eat everything, or you left some for your family too?" Three questions in one was her deal, and it made Midorima look confused.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked, pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose.

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?" Shige asked with an amused little smile.

"I asked first!"

"Well, I've asked second! And anyways, actually, I was the first one to ask!"

"Three questions at the same time!"

"You can answer them in order, you know...." Shige crossed her arms in front of her, and so did Midorima. When they've noticed that they did the same motion, they both exhaled quickly.

"You don't have to make food for everyone every single day." He said now, and Shige wrinkled her eyebrows.

"You're not the one to tell me what I should do and what I shouldn't do." 

"You can't even pay attention to anything because you keep cooking in all of your free time."

"Why does it bother you what I do with my freetime?" She asked, and now the whole situation was getting a little strange.

"You should be pushing yourself to become better, to be the best at what you're already good at."

"You're saying this, but if I'd stop making you those ricerolls you'd probably complain....."

"I eat my own food!" Midorima could insist as much as he wanted to, but above all, his label was faded the most.

"Yeah, yeah. Right..." Shige rolled her eyes, and then smiled. "Hey, so..." When that was finally over, she took a deep breath. "Did you plan on coming to the Halloween party?"

"I won't go. I'm not interested in Halloween the slightest. That tradition is basically bulit on misfortune and dead people." 

Shigemi's laugh now reflected Takao's a little, as she held her stomach while doing so.

"H-hey! That wasn't a joke!" He continued, his cheeks a bit rosy.

"Those are just superstitions. Black cats, Jack-o-lanterns and bats doesn't mean anything bad or spooky and they certainly don't bring you bad luck."

"It's literally the devil's night and you don't take it seriously one bit." His words were growing more and more hilarious. Shige couldn't stop laughing.

"I've never in my life thought I'd have a good laugh around you." Wiping her cheeks her laughter finally died down a little, only to see a pair of extremely serious green orbs.

"Believe in what you will, I am not going to go to that party." He finished, turning away from her. Before getting to his business, though, he looked back at her over his left shoulder, calling her name. "That peach jam you've made for Takao... It was pretty good."

So it was the peach jam for Midorima.

Shigemi nodded softly.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: owie 3500 word university essay yuck! 
> 
> also me: types 10+k words on phone bc yay :) cute ships haha lol !!!

Shigemi's never been to a costume party before. It took a whole week for them to figure out who's going to dress up as who, and in the end, she was satisfied with her own member.

She was going to wear the skin of Sailor Neptune for a night.

On the actual day of the party, school was dismissed so the art and drama club could decorate the gym with their props and prepare everything for the night thanks to the IT club. A little after lunch she's left home with all of her stuff, and as settled earlier, they were going to prepare together at Minami's place as she lived the closest to the school.

"Don't worry guys. I watch a lot of cosplay preparation on Youtube, I know what to do with your makeup." Ayame said, and Shigemi swore for a second the girl's had tiny devil horns.

Venus was Izumi's choice, Saturn was for Minami, and Ayame wanted to be Mercury. Their company's made Shige relax a little bit. Their costumes were simple white gym dresses with color coordinated collars. Gloves, bracelets, rings, necklaces, earrings and additional extras were added to spice up their outfits accordingly. She was honestly thankful for Ayame's endless anime addiction, the makeup she's prepared for them was better she would ever make for herself in a thousand lifetimes, and additionally, she's also offered to lend them wigs for the night.

It was a fun time, seeing eachother with no hair for a second, only so in the end they could wear the wig of their beloved Sailor choice. Despite how uncomfortable it was thanks to the tight wig, the tight gym dress, the false eyelashes, lack of socks, Shige kept encouraging herself to make it through because it is going to be a lot of fun. Staring at herself in the mirror, with those deep green curls and tiara on her head, she's seen resemblance. Her look reminded her of someone else. Oh and how much she thought about him lately.

So Minami's parents were absolutely in awe when they saw the little squad, taking atleast a million different pictures. Shige's had a small polaroid camera in her backpack for later so she could maybe make some memories for herself as well. She loved polaroids a lot, especially the ones that were signed by the people on the pictures.

The snow was already gone from the streets, as if nothing's happened in this crazy month. They were walking together in their casual shoes, deciding it's probably not a great idea to wear high heels of the Sailors in a fully crowded room where they could stumble so easily.

Shige was nervous, it made her stomach flinch and she was a little silent thanks to all the excitement welling up in her body. Her hands were a little shaky as she opened the door to the school, friends following behind. There was music filling the long halls far away from the gym already, and unintentionally so, their footsteps quickened a little.

Seeing so many people already crowded in the room of the main event made her shiver in ways she didn't know she could. She's seen this amounts of people before, but they weren't really her age and the possibility of them talking to her weren't quite open either. The four of them have been holding hands so they don't get lost in the continously waving crowd of people, and making it through the gym was already an accomplishment. In the court at the other end of the gym, there were tiny tents set up for foods, drinks, miscallenaous things for entertainment if the inside wasn't enough. The decor was absolutely fascinating both inside an outside, paper bats, cats, pumpinks and cauldrons covered in glitter, shaped like 3D objects were hanging everywhere.

In a way, she wished to pinch Midorima, shake him back to reality to he'd see none of these actually mean anything bad. They were, in fact, pretty cool.

Shige sat down in her costume, scratching her nape because of the wig. She was uncomfortable, but it was worth it. It was worth it. Even more so than usual she's felt the eyes of others on her, but tonight she knew it wasn't because of her identity. She just looked cool and there wasn't anything wrong with embracing it. Now outside, under the dim moonlight, they've been munching on some spooky snacks, cupcakes that were decorated like graves, fingers, eyeballs. As gruesome as it looked, it was very tasty.

"I can't believe I'm saying this," Ayame said licking the frosting off her fingers, "But I want to go inside and dance with a cute guy."

Besides Shige, everyone's got really excited about the idea. She took a bite into the marzipan decoration, when Minami cuddled up against her. "So, you're coming too? You'd have such an easy time, Shige, it's unfair. You always look so cute. Those falsies makes your eyes even bigger!" The girl moaned, and it made her smile.

"I don't know if I want to. I don't really like how full the whole gym seems. I don't wanna' get pushed around." Shige said now, placing her cupcake back onto the napkin.

"Come on, let's go! Surely you'll find someone you'll be able to relax with. Don't be so tense." Izumi took hold of her hand in order to squeeze it a little. Shige nodded in the end.

The inside was warm, sultry, sweaty, in a way, disgusting. Students were dancing to the rhythmic beat of loud pop music, and Shige was pushed too hard for just a split second to be torn away from the rest of her friends. She was looking around nervously, turning as the wave kept on pushing her in a direction, until she actually got squeezed up against someone else.

"I-I'm sorry!" She screamed, but it was muffled by the crowd probably. Someone took hold of her shoulders and shook his head. Looking up at the student who's peace she disturbed, she got absolutely dumbstruck. He's had gorgeous, characteristic features, sharp jawline, long, golden locks and similar colored eyes. She wanted to say something, anything, but before she could, she met a kind smile.

"Don't worry! It's absolutely crazy here, isn't it!" The boy screamed, and she nodded immediately.

"Oh, are you Sailor Neptune? It's looking so cool on you!" He said, stars glimmering in his eyes as he examined her costume. There was a blush on Shige's cheeks, but maybe it was just the warmth of the room. "I'm a vampire, but it's just not as cool as yours." The following was blurted out fast, and Shige's missed atleast half of it.

Before she could orderly react, there was a change in music, and he cut in again. "This song is like my favorite, let's dance!" He screamed with shiny eyes and grabbed her hands immediately without thinking.

There wasn't anything Shige could do, so she just went with it. The whole crowd was singing and dancing and screaming, making her a bit dizzy and her breathing heavier, but she tried really hard to go with the flow and dance with this one boy. From time to time, he held their hands up so she could twirl a little, which she did, smiling in the end. It was just good fun, wasn't it? 

One song, followed by another, and another, and another. They were dancing their feets off together, and actually seemed to be in almost perfect sync every time, which made her wonder whether he was a dancer himself or not. He wasn't annoying really, just really chatty and easily excited, so any song that came on was titled as his favorite, which made her giggle a lot. It was, in a way, adorable that he could hold that innocent childish excitement. 

When her feet felt a little sore due to the uncomfortable footwear for dancing all night long, her fingers gripped into his shirt a little, asking for his attention. She didn't even mind losing her friends at the moment, allowing herself to be a little free and enjoy good music made her feel the best she had in a long time. 

"Oh, you wanna' go outside?" He shouted, and Shige nodded multiple times, fast. His response was the same, so with her lead she cut some way through the crowd, and was met by the night's chill moments later. She was somewhat sweaty and uncomfortable, red thanks to the gym's sultry air, and breathing heavy because of all the dancing she's been on about. It was really hard to admit, but all this management messed up her freetime and dancing again felt truly refreshing. 

"Fresh air is so nice!" He groaned, sitting down onto a woven chair under an orange, lit umbrella. His cheeks were pale thanks to the makeup, and words were somewhat distorted because of the plastic fangs. He covered himself in the mauve drape he's been wearing for his vampire costume. Shige couldn't really comprehend what was going on right now. 

"You're a quiet girl, aren't you?" He asked for her attention once again, and she looked his way. "That's okay. D'you wanna sit down?" The blondie asked, his cheeks similarly blushed, out of breath. Without an answer, Shige hopped down right beside him.

"You're a really good dancer. Have you been learning it?" She asked after a few moments of silence, making him laugh.

"Not really. I guess I'm just a natural." He giggled on, making Shige huff-n-puff a little. Natural, of course. She wasn't going to eat that. "Plus, I've had a pretty good teacher."

"Wait, you just said you didn't.. -"

"I didn't. You were standing all the time in front of me though."

Shige was just stupidly blinking at him, but from one moment to another, she's felt an ache in her left eye.

"Ouch!" She groaned all of a sudden, raising a hand to try to pick and remove the falsie that has shifted into her eye now, but before she could so, he noticed it as well.

"Lemme help." Giving her a confident smile, he slid his fingers under her chin to keep her face steady, and with his other hand, softly started pulling on the falsie. Shige felt really, really awkward.

"Is this meant to be so stiff?" He asked, pulling on it a little stronger now.

"It's just the glue, I guess...." Shige whispered, and once it was off, his face was dangerously close to hers. She was blinking at his golden orbs, and sharp nose, and long eyelashes, and well shaped eyebrows, and all of that just made her think who the hell was this. Even now, he seemed to radiate confidence, which made her quake. His whole aura was a little overwhelming. Something she's felt before.

"Kise."

A firm voice cracked the tension between them, making both of them jump at the same time further away from eachother. Precisely, it took about one second to identify the source of the voice, and in the next second, unintentionally so, her heart fluttered.

"Midorimacchi! I was wondering whether we'd meet here or not!" The blondie, apparently Kise, replied with a huge smile, jolting up from his seat. He was going to go for a hug, from which Midorima kept him away.

"What are you doing here?" He asked on a low voice, and only now did Shige realize what exactly has he been wearing.

Midorima seemed to be the lower part of a two-man horse costume, and Shige could barely hold her laughter back. Of all things, he decided to come AND dress up as the lower part of a horse. She held her hands against her lips to muffle her chuckles, and in the meantime, the other part of the horse sat down next to her. She was startled, then a familiar cackle was audible.

"Gotcha' good, Shige-chan." Takao grinned, and Shige hit his arm lightly.

"How did you get him to come, Takao-kun?" She giggled, and when Takao looked at him again he started too.

"How did I get him to come? It was his idea in the first place."

Wait, that meant Midorima was lying to her! Lying! Oh, how she'd hit him for that - they seemed to know eachother with Kise, and were in a heated argument now. Takao cuddled up against her again, and started whispering.

"Shin-chan was looking for you all along. When he's seen you with this Kise-guy, oh my! You should have seen that look on his face!" The raven haired boy smirked and laughed, making Shigemi's stomach flinch and flutter again. Was he... Jealous? He wanted to come and see her? Why? Since when?

"Shigemi." His voice now adressed her, and not even a moment later he was already holding her wrist, pulling her away.

"Answer my texts sometimes, Midorimacchi!!!"

"Die." He mumbled before turning around the corner, dragging the still very confused Shige with him.

Once they climbed up to the first floor of the school, were the music wasn't as audible and noone was wondering around, Midorima stopped in the shadows. Only the ridiculous pants and whatever held it there were visible. It still amused Shige endlessly, but her confusion was greater now.

"What do you want? I didn't even know you were here. Why did you bring me here? I was having a lot of fun with Takao and Kise and,-"

"Stop. You're talking too much."

"I'm talking too much? I think you're not talking enough!"

"Why should I say more when you don't seem to understand the simplest of things?"

"Did you bring me away to insult me? Because you very well could have done that in front of the others too, you know that, right?"

Shige's cheeks were glowing red now, and not for the good reason. She's crossed her arms, and hated how her stomach couldn't stay still even now.

"And also, what's this stupid costume? What about your stupid superstitions? What's wrong with you?" She kept on asking more and more questions, and he was just standing there in silence. After a deep breath, and some recollected thoughts, she looked back at him again.

"Are you really not going to say anything?" Shige whispered now, taking a step closer. They were already a little close, but now she was even closer. His back was against the wall, and he was looking down at her.

"You're so stupid," She mumbled, and the moonlight was shining on his hands now. Urge washed over her and she reached out to his right, fingers trailing over his veins, knuckles and eventually his long fingers. He's had somewhat sturdy hands, large ones, and seemed to be reactive to her touch with them.

A scoff was audible from above.

"Stupid, huh? You're one to say that." His voice was now lower than she's ever heard before. His hand radiated warmth, and it was such a comfortable, cozy feeling. The butterflies in her stomach took off, and weren't going to land anytime soon. "Green isn't really your color." He continued, making her look to the side in annoyance.

"You're so annoying, too," Shige said, hitting his chest lightly with her other hand. He took hold of her wrist immediately.

"And you look really wonky with one eyelash only." He said, and embarassment washed over her. She totally forgot she was missing one. However, when she wanted to reach up to cover her face, she couldn't, as both of her hands were in his hold.

"L-let go of me," Shige giggled lightly, and for a split moment, it seemed to even work. But instead of letting her remove the remaining eyelash, he reached up to her face, and started pulling it off with so much gentleness she didn't knew he held.

His eyes were glimmering in the dim shadows of the corridor, orbs moving quickly to make the most precise little movements.

"Why were you hanging out with Kise, anyways?" He blurted out once the plastic falsie was in his hand.

"Were you jealous?" Shige asked with a smirk, and it seemed to make him blush. Which made her stomach twitch.

"N-no. It's just, he used to be my teammate in junior high school. However, we weren't on the best terms."

"He seemed to like you, though."

"That doesn't matter."

"Why not? Maybe it you were a little friendly with people from time to time, you could smile as much too!" In reality, when she thought about a smiley Midorima, it seemed a little creepy. His stoic, indifferent features were so fitting for him.

"Didn't he annoy you?"

"No, I think he was sweet, honestly." Shige said, combing the wig with her fingers now.

"Sweet?"

"Well, yeah. I guess."

"Hmm, I see." Midorima murmured now, making her eyes turn back onto him.

"Does he annoy you?" She asked, and Midorima sighed.

"Very much so."

"Do I annoy you?" Shige grinned in a very childish manner.

"Even more so." He replied, and then... Was that a smile? How handsome! For a second she's thought she reached her melting point, but then she remembered what he just said.

"Hey, I'm not that bad!" She shrieked, and Midorima insisted right away.

"You're right, you're worse. You're obnoxious, an absolute goody-two-shoes, it's just really, really annoying." He said, and Shige pretended she didn't hear what he was on about.

"La-la-la, I can't hear youuuu," She cupped her ears with her hands, and a second later, Midorima's fingers wrapped around both of them.

"This wig is a disaster, get it off." He mumbled, looking her seriously in the eye. Shige couldn't stop blushing.

"I-.. I can't. There are way too many bobby pins in my hair." She whispered again, and the whole situation was just ridiculous and she couldn't hold her laugh in. 

"Sit down, I'll help you."

"Wait, before you do that...."

Shige took a step back from him to search her bag on her side; a moment later, she pulled out a fragile, baby blue polaroid camera.

"What? You want me to take a picture of you?" The boy asked, and she was just shaking her head.

"No-no," An evil aura seemed to surround her for a second, "To take one of us. You have longer arms than I do."

"I refuse."

"It's how you could make up for your jealousy~" Shige almost sang, shaking the camera in her hand a little.

"I was not jealous!" Midorima insisted again, and a drawn-out sigh was audible from him. "Whatever." He moaned again, taking the camera from her hands. Shige's eyes were basically sparkling.

They were standing in the corridor, where the moonlight was the brightest, and Shige was cuddled up against his right arm, throwing peace signs, and he probably had the most annoyed expression on his faced, but for her it didn't quite matter. When the camera clicked and the lights flashed, a tiny photo was ejected, and she really couldn't feel any happier.

When they were sitting upstairs, Shigemi facing away and Midorima standing behind her, light chatter filled the halls.

"Tell me more about your former teammates." She muttered, her fingertips tapping on her thighs as the boy behind was slowly but surely getting every single bobby pin out of her hair with masterful precision.

"There's nothing special about them other than their talents." He cut it really short, and Shige's had her eyes closed because technically it felt like he was giving her a scalp massage. Well, until he started pulling on her hair a little thanks to missing a pin.

"Hey hey hey!" She went from comfort to panic in one second.

"Quit crying already."

"You're doing a poor job and it's my fault if it hurts?" There were some things about this guy that could really set her off.

He assisted her nevertheless, removing the last resort that kept that wig on her head. Putting it to the side, she sighed in relief as finally it wasn't pulling her head down. She took off the wig cap, and started combing her hair with her fingers.

"What a relief," Laying back on the corridor couch she was sitting on, she took off her shoes and pulled her legs up onto the furniture. "I could fall asleep right now." Having her eyes closed, she was just relaxing for a second, ignoring the sounds of movement around her. A minute or so passed before she opened her eyes again, and when she did, his gaze met hers.

"You're always staring at me. Why?" Her voice was almost like a whisper's.

"Your stockings are ripped."

What? She looked down quickly onto her feet, running her hands all over it only to find out that he was pranking her. That was right, she didn't remember ripping them, as far as she was aware, she didn't do anything that could harm them.

Looking back at him, a somewhat satisfied and really amused smirk was sitting on his lips.

"Alright, ha-ha, you've pranked me, very funny." She faked a laughter, and his smile didn't seem to cease. "This building is pretty cold." Of course, she's had nothing covering her arms, and all she was wearing was a thin gym dress with a skirt and a collar. "Aren't you cold?"

"No. I came here wearing actual clothes."

"Oh, hey guys! Look at him! He came to the party wearing AcTuAl cLoThEs." She pretended as if there was anyone else around them, looking around, pointing. That horse costume still looked hilarious.

"You're not funny."

"Just because you're not laughing that doesn't mean I'm not funny." She stuck a tongue out at him, her arms crossed in front of her. A moment later, he stood up from his seat all the way across her, and sat down next to her.

"You're still not funny." He repeated and looked away, as he put his arm on the top of the couch, giving signs that she can scoot closer if the situation is so serious. Which she did, without hesitation.

Once again, his body's felt like a chimney, and she was happy to curl up against it. Her left ear was against his chest, and from time to time she could hear his heartbeat, feel how his chest rose and fall as he was breathing. It was serene, calm, and silent, unlike how he kept coming back at her. He refused to look down on her, which she noticed by how his head was basically pinned to the left, examining doors he's probably seen about a million times already. As if they were interesting.

She warmed her hands on his stomach, that seemed to flinch to her touch. That thing, she could really relate to. They weren't talking, and he wasn't touching her at all, but it was still as good as it could get.

Shige kept wondering about the mysteries that were yet to unfold. Who he was, and where he came from. What were his motives for the future, what type of juice did he like and how did he manage to be so in control all the time. Whenever something bad happened, she had a bad tendency of falling into tiny pieces, and those pieces took time to collect. A lot of time. There were still things that wasn't a whole because of the past.

All of a sudden, that smile she couldn't wipe off before was gone, and she was just staring at the sofa right in front of her.

"You have really bad energies surrounding you all the time." He blurred abruptly, sight still steered away from her.

"We all struggle with this and that." A whisper was his response.

"This and that doesn't mean all the time."

"Who are you to give things a proper definition based on your opinion?" She asked, and all of a sudden, she's felt his hand on her head. It was spread wide on her soft, white locks, fingertips dipping under the mass a little until they were actually touching her scalp. That blush on her cheeks, she was so happy he didn't see it.

"All I'm trying to say is, you have to sort it out. It's offputting for everyone."

"Why would it be offputting for you, though? You don't care about anything." When she said that though, one of her conversations with Takao came up in her mind. He probably did care, beneath the surface. He's just had no way or intention of showing it. Shige was feeling bad for adressing him like that.

"You're right, I don't. But if it's going to bring down the morale, it will make everyone perform worse. And worse performance will make the coach mad, who will unleash hell on you."

Shige rolled her eyes. She sat up angrily, her brows furrowed, hands on the couch now.

"You still want me to leave, is that it?" Shige asked, biting her lower lip. For a second, he didn't answer. He didn't even look her way. "Look at me when we're talking." She whispered, and it really made him turn. When he looked at her, she met the same old cold gaze, that was staring at her almost emotionlessly.

"You'd probably find more success elsewhere." He replied short. It was almost breaking her heart. She swallowed.

"There's no ballet club in this school. I am practicing in my free time. The association I was in before I left years ago disbanded in the meantime, the place that used to be my home was gone. Private dancing isn't the same. There are no people, and no competitions, and no plays, and no nothing. Tell me, what can I do? Where can I go? Should I travel for three more hours, just to reach another district where I can attend to a two hour practice, and travel home in five hours? You're right, how didn't I think of that before." She hit her forehead softly, rolling her eyes. "You wouldn't understand. Basketball isn't the same thing."

"The spirit behind it is the same," He was quiet for a second again, before a short sigh. "It makes no sense that you've decided to stay in a school that doesn't help out your individual progression."

She was gawping, creaking, but no actual words came out. Unbelieveable. There was such a heavy rage boiling deep inside of her. Shige shook her head, breathing deeply.

"If this upsets you, then you've got a lot you still don't understand about the world."

Now her cheeks were on flames.

"Y-you know... I think you don't understand a lot of things about the world. Like the weight of your words." Her voice cracked multiple times in this one sentence, as she tried to hold her tears back.

"I understand and know them perfectly. Statistically proven, harsher words are more honest, which will result in actual progress rather than being soft and never getting to your point."

She completely shut off.

"I was actually thinking we were getting to know eachother and-"

"No."

His words fell down her throat and pulled down her stomach. Shige's eyes burned.

"Don't indulge yourself in that foolishness. Focus on your own progress, and stop relying on everyone else around you. Only you can save yourself, and noone else." Every single word of his was a punch in the gut. 

He was still sitting so close, and his warmth was the same as before, yet when she looked at him, she failed to recognize.

"I won't quit just because you want me to."

This time, Midorima sighed. Abruptly, he stood up, and looked down at her.

"Waste away your talents, then." He said shortly, and turned away from her. "Goodnight."

Goodnight... Goodnight? How could this be a good night still?

His footsteps echoed through the long halls, and all the things that just happened made her dizzy. They were playing this game all the time, in which sometimes she could pretend things were alright and normal, and then, to his pleasure, he could punch her as much as he wanted to.

Shige failed to breathe in, and it caused her to burst out in tears. She didn't want to resist it anymore, or hold back, so she was sobbing as loudly as she could without having a care in the world. Her shoulders were quaking, and she's absolutely despised her own self for being so fragile and foolish again.

He was right.

Noone else was going to save her, so she should be her own savior. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shige: he breaks my heart every single time i talk to him
> 
> also shige: oh hi, hru?? 
> 
> lemme tell ya, this girl is looking for trouble. lol. thanks for the 30 hits ! uwu

_Why am I so conflicted? Is it because I've allowed him to get under my skin, poison my thoughts and give me heartache? If I was to stay away from human contact just to keep myself safe, I'd might as well stay lonely forever._

_I was so dumb. So, so dumb. He's not a warm person, and he clearly doesn't want to be one either. He doesn't want friends. He's just chasing his own destiny, proposing whatever's best for him._

Shige didn't sleep much on the weekend. Her thoughts have grown all the more self-destructive, she's lost her appetite and wasn't motivated to get up at all.

The incident at the party's left her more crushed than she originally thought it would, yet she's still had some of her fighting spirit left in herself. In a way, she couldn't allow him to push her out - keep her from what she enjoyed. In the end, life wasn't only about being excellent in one thing and one thing only - It was about experiences. Stumbling, and falling, trying out the one weird icecream on the list and wearing sunglasses at night. She was so young, and should have been a lot more reckless.

She just couldn't allow herself it because of her own restrictions. Her parents' expectations. Whatever the world wanted of her wasn't what she wanted for herself.

Only the club.

The basketball club... To work with them, was fully her choice. To stay, to leave. To work little or a lot, it was all up to her. It's why all the boys have meant so much to her. They were the key to her little bit of freedom, which was partially ruined now. But not everyone wanted her gone, right?

She didn't know. She couldn't know for sure.

Weeks have passed with Shige avoiding Midorima. They've been exchanging glances from time to time, short, awkward ones. The quality of her meals have dropped due to her exhaustion, sometimes the meat has remained raw, or the fruits looked a little weird. It was her best; only her best wasn't really good.

On a gloomy, grey Saturday, Shuutoku was going to have a match. A proper match.

Shigemi's stomach has been swirling all morning, causing anxiety to rush through her veins. During the week, she's been filling papers, calling people, making sure everything was in order and precisely done, despite her precision though, she still couldn't calm down.

She was wearing the school's colors, orange sweatpants and a white shirt on top. Her hair was in a messy ponytail, unruly locks living their own lives outside of the tie. Nervosity wasn't in the air though, when she's entered the locker room once the boys finished changing. Confidence filled the space, and it made Shige slightly calmer.

"Keep yourselves to the original plan, everyone. In the first quarter, we will deny them to take the lead with a defensive playstyle, focusing around our own three-point arc." As the coach repeated the gameplan one last time, Shige's had her back against the wall, staring at all of them. During practice, they were all a bit more relaxed, but now, their focus almost seemed intimidating. Midorima was sitting on the bench, unwrapping the tape off his fingers. There wasn't anything unusual about him, despite how the rest of the boys changed. Well, everyone besides Takao. Who still enjoyed bothering him when and wherever he could.

Once the coach finished, Shige stepped up to him.

"Nakatani-sensei," she murmured, holding some papers in her hands mainly of statistics and details. "Is it okay if I go and get something to drink quickly?" For a second, it was clearly visible on the older man's features that he was wondering, contemplating as if something serious's happened, but in the end, he just nodded with a sigh.

"Make sure to get back in ten minutes." He adressed her firmly, and with a quick bow of gratitude, she left the room. The air was much lighter outside, and only then did she realize that she might have had trouble breathing. Shige walked downstairs, back to the entrance hall where a couple of vending machines were standing. Staring at the repetoir, she wasn't sure what she wanted, coffee or soda. For minutes, she's been moving between the two machines, and before she could pick, she got interrupted.

"Oh, hi!"

A familiar voice was audible from behind her, to which she immediately turned around. It was Kise, standing in front of her, wearing a latte colored suit with a black tie, looking very elegant. His sight has given her flashbacks of everything that's happened that night and her stomach flinched.

"Nice to see you again." She murmured just out of formality, and gave him a gentle smile. He stood moved up to stand next to her.

"Nice to see you too,...."

"Shigemi."

"Nice to see you too, Shigemi-chan." Her name's felt strange on his lips. "What are you doing here? Are you a fan of basketball?" He asked, making his choice rather quickly, pressing the number pad code for some blueberry soda.

"Oh, um..." Shige scratched her nape softly, "No. I am the manager of Shuutoku's basketball.... Team." Before her last word, Kise turned to her with wide eyes, seemingly shocked. "Is something... Wrong?"

"Midorimacchi didn't even mention that you liked basketball!"

"I... You... When did you talk?"

"Oh, you know, before he decided to drag you away. Now that I think about it, I've never seen him act so strange... And trust me, I've seen some things from him over the years!" Kise's let out a lighthearted chuckle, which made Shige smile too.

"What a shame, though. We were having fun, weren't we?" He asked again, popping the can open.

"Y.. Yeah. I wish I've stayed." Shige murmured her second sentence, and even if Kise's heard it, he surely didn't make a comment on it.

"Hey, I was wondering...." When he looked at her again, his gorgeous golden orbs reflected confidence that was washing over her now. "I know that technically until about three minutes ago I didn't even know your name, but... Yeah, so..." Despite his aura, he was just stacking words. "I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go somewhere? Together?"

Shige now was just blinking at him stupidly. A wild blush was dancing on her cheeks as she looked away a little.

"As on a.. Date?" She asked back, and Kise confirmed immediately. "I-I mean...."

"You don't have to say yes if you don't want to, I'm not forcing anyt-"

"I'd love to do that, yeah." She agreed shortly, not even understanding where did all of her confidence suddenly came from. Maybe in a way he gave her some.

"Really? That's so amazing!" He hurrayed, giving her a big smile. "I have to go and catch up to my team now, but um... What about exchanging numbers?"

And they did. Once it was done, he left in a hurry, waving at her from the end of the corridor before disappearing.

All she wanted was a coffee.

Now, she's got a date.

Shige moved as quick as her feet allowed her, and she made it back just in time for the start. Midorima was sitting on the bench, holding a plastic beaver in a chequered flanel shirt and a banjou. When she sat down as well, in his close proximity but still far enough, he turned to her.

"Shigemi." Him calling her by her name still made her shudder. "Could you give my hand a massage?" The audacity. As a manager though, she couldn't allow herself to say no. The match's begun, and the typical sound of indoor shoes creaking against the floor filled their ears. Loud cheering was audible from everywhere around them as she sat closer to Midorima, taking his sturdy left into her hands. Shige rubbed his knuckles and joints precisely, their eyes avoiding eachothers.

It's something he could have done for himself too, honestly. She gave a proper, long warm-up session to all of his fingers and wrist, and he was silently taking all of it, watching the match unfold with calm confidence. Shige's eyes were tracing the crowd, and when she noticed Kise sitting far away, it looked like he was only waiting for her eyes to move over there. He was madly waving and smiling, until a hit on his head- which he rubbed, and still kept on smiling afterwards. Maybe it was a good thing that she's said yes.

Why did she feel so guilty though, with Midorima's hand in her own?

The match turned out the way everyone's expected. It's really hard to beat one of the Three Kings of Tokyo. As always, it'a felt like a blessing to her eyes, watching Midorima play and hit every single one of his shots. He truly was a God.

────────────

Later that night, in bed, she's searched up this and that about the Generation of Miracles. Knowing absolutely nothing about Kise, she's found out that his power was probably the most powerful out of anyone's. Finally, she also understood how he managed to groove so fine weeks ago.

Getting to know Kise was a ride that kept her up almost all the time. The boy was continously cheerful and excited, happy to share more about himself and learn continously about her. For some weird reason, one she couldn't really identify or understand overall, when they've been texting about sports, and Shige mentioned her love for ballett and some of her minor accomplishments on the field, he switched to call her another nickname.

Most of his texts were like, "Shigemicchi, you're so cool!"

Which made her honestly fluttered. Kise was a perfect example of how one should never let the world get the best of them, , despite being burning out or not finding excitement in things anymore. He honestly encouraged her so much for her likes and hobbies and preferances, that with every day gone by she's felt like she made a good choice with saying yes to that date.

Which arrived almost two weeks later, when Kise could finally free up a Friday. It was a sunny yet chilly Friday, on which she already discussed with the coach to miss the afternoon practice. It was not compulsory for her to go anyways, but she still wanted to give a heads up about her absence.

When her last class was over, she was standing outside of her classroom, texting on her phone, telling her mom she'd only go home sometime in the evening.

Tingles appeared on her thighs as she's sensed that someone was behind her.

"I've heard you're not coming today."

That comment made Shige scoff.

"Is that a problem all of a sudden?"

Turning around to look at him still made her heart ache. She hasn't talked to him properly in weeks, she's avoided all eyecontact, only said words to him when it was absolutely necessary. Her phone was buzzing non stop in her hands. He seemed to ignore her reply.

"Why? Have you finally came to your senses?"

She didn't even take it personally anymore. He was just mean, and that was all to it. Bitter and mean. Midorima was holding a fluffy, white kitten paw on a stick in his hands.

"No. It's not your business."

"I know you're mad since our last conversation, but...."

"There are no buts!" When her voice turned a little higher than she originally intended, she sighed. "Let's just leave eachother alone for good. You've told me to focus on myself, and I am doing that." In a way, it felt refreshing, almost freeing to say that. "You won't be my savior, I get it. You don't have to be."

"You're angry with me for no reason-"

"No reason?", An offended chuckle was audible, "Right. I guess everything's my fault, then." Shige's smile was now sarcastic, hurt.

"What I wanted for you was all out of good intention. You can't rely on others forever. And you can't just let yourself fall out of practice."

_Good intention, sure._

"Your communication skills are very poor." She replied, picking her bag up.

"Why aren't you coming?" He asked again, as if it mattered. As if he wasn't going to make fun of it again.

"Goodbye. Good luck on the practice."

She was about to turn away, when he grabbed her wrist again. _"Shigemi."_

"Stop repeating my name! Stop stopping me all the time! Why are you doing this? You always want me to leave yet you keep pulling me back, you always say mean stuff and then look at me like I was the one who hurt you!"

His expression was steeled, yet hints of sadness shone through.

"You know what? I'll say it. Despite how unreasonably cold and distant and mean you were, despite how you exposed me when I asked you not to, I still... Really really liked you. I wanted to know more, I was curious of who you were, and if you were different when people didn't see you. You're so afraid of being vulnurable, of being a person with legit feelings that you've decided to erase all of them. Hide behind a tall fucking wall, where noone and nothing will ever reach. That's easy, isn't it? You know what's hard? Struggling home, and struggling here, facing comments and jokes and superficial shit all the time! That's what's hard. Admitting your feelings, that's what's so fucking hard." She wasn't really into swearing, but there was no space left in her mind to think, she was just spilling all these words at him. "Sit behind your walls in your safety. You'll never experience the sunshine that way."

She pulled her wrist out of his grasp, and turned around. One more look exchanged, and she thought he was going to cry-

Not like she wanted to stay around to watch or say more.

Turning the corner, realization suddenly hit her. She was out of breath, and had to stop to recollect her thoughts.

Kise insisted on picking her up from school, and she couldn't go out looking and feeling like a mess.


End file.
